This is more common than you might think, and it doesn't automatically mean an intensive won't work. What matters more than symmetrical enthusiasm is that both of you are willing to be present and to try.

If one of you is genuinely opposed, or attending primarily to prove a point, that's worth a conversation before you book. But if one of you is nervous, sceptical, or uncertain, that's understandable, and it doesn't need to be resolved in advance.

A few things might be different including how the intensive format itself changes the experience. Rather than touching something and then spending a week in ordinary life before returning to it, you stay with the work long enough to actually work through it.

My approach is also assessment-led. Before we begin, I spend time understanding your relationship as a whole: not just the presenting problem, but how you each came to be who you are in relationships, what you're carrying individually, and what's actually underneath the patterns you keep returning to.

If previous therapy felt like it circled the same ground without getting anywhere, or focused on communication skills without touching what was driving the difficulty, this is likely to feel quite different.

An intensive won't always feel easy while it's happening and some couples find things feel more tender or raw before they begin to settle. That's not the same as making things worse, though it can feel that way in the moment.

What the intensive format offers is containment. You're not going home after sixty minutes with something half-processed and a week to wait before returning to it. instead you have the opportunity to stay in the room long enough for things to change.

There are situations where an intensive isn't the right container, and if anything in your consultation suggests that, I'll let you know and we’ll think about what might be a better fit. Part of my job is making sure we're working in a way that's safe for both of you.

Yes. An intensive isn't appropriate where there is current domestic abuse or coercive control, where one or both partners are in acute mental health crisis, or where there are active substance use difficulties. It also isn't the right starting point when there are things that haven't been disclosed that are directly relevant to why you're here.

If any of these apply, I'm happy to talk through what might be more appropriate instead.

Sometimes, yes. It depends on where you are. If the infidelity has been disclosed, if you're both committed to understanding what happened rather than simply managing it, and if there's enough stability to sustain three mornings of deep work, an intensive can be a very helpful format for this kind of repair.

If things are still very raw, the disclosure is recent, or there's significant unresolved crisis around it, a period of weekly sessions first may make more sense. We'd talk about this in your consultation before anything is decided.

The intensive itself — the three morning sessions across one week — is in-person, from my consultation room in Sheffield’s Cathedral Quarter.

The preparation week (the four sessions the week before) and your follow-up session two weeks afterwards can both be done online.

The intensive is designed to be substantial in itself, not a starting point that leaves you without a clear next step. What comes afterwards varies. Some couples want a small number of follow-up sessions to consolidate what they've worked on as things settle back into ordinary life. Others feel ready to continue independently.

We'll talk about this at the end of the intensive, when we have a much clearer picture of where you've landed and what, if anything, would be useful next.

Yes. The Gottman Method, which forms the core of my couples work, is one of the most extensively researched approaches in the field. John and Julie Gottman's work spans more than four decades and thousands of couples, and the intervention methods developed from that research have been tested in clinical trials. It's a model built on watching how relationships actually work and what helps changes them.

The intensive format is supported by a growing body of evidence, and by the clinical understanding of what concentrated, uninterrupted work makes possible. It's used increasingly in both trauma and couples contexts because continuity produces a different rhythm of change than weekly sessions can.

The investment for a couples intensive is £2100. This covers the preparation week, the intensive itself and the follow-up session.

I understand that's a significant amount to find at once. Payment plans are available, please get in touch and we can talk through what this might look like.